31 days.

I really like schedules. Even if I have free time, I like knowing its from time A to time B. I get incredibly excited when I get to make a new schedule for my classes and think about planning it the minute the courses are released.

So you can see why this 31 days is enticing to me. And what better time than before Allume?

When I saw the posts about this idea popping up a couple days ago, it didn’t take me long to think of one. With a little more stress going on lately, my messy food habits decided they need to take their turn in messing with me too. Something you might have caught on to. 😉

My word for the month?

Healing.

A little bit of writing each day. A lot of learning.

I’m entering with the hope and expectation of walking out of this month with a deeper walk with the Lord, and a big dose of healing in my heart.

I believe that when you create the space, The Lord will come, He will fill it.

The Lord is not boxed in by our schedule, but we do have to welcome Him.

I’m starting this month without any posts already written and without any idea (other than the word healing) of what I’m going to write about.

I’m making no promises, but it should be fun. 🙂

when you’re hungry.

“Sometimes you are so hungry that the only you can be fed is to fast.” -Susan Gregory, Author of The Daniel Fast

I’ve been in a funk.

Call it exhausted, call it unfocused, call it an influx of hormones, call it hungry.

I’ve been all over the place lately and its time to reel it in, but not by me.

Yesterday was one of those “last days.” But it was different. I went to Books a Million to sip on a soy latte and spend the day among the books. I went to a cute little French Bakery for lunch and had a veggie scone and cannoli. At work, the girl in the bakery asked if I wanted a little cup of cookie dough, I mean, come on.

But something happened yesterday, other than the normal stomach ache. These things I was filling myself with didn’t hold any weight (other than the bloated tummy I woke up with). I felt the same dull ache in my heart that was there before. These things don’t satisfy. I’m sorry I’m like a broken record with all this stuff, its the “sheep” in me. 😉

Oh, this feeling hurts, this feeling of searching and not finding, of something that once seemed like it might help loose its luster. And I hurt when I see it in others. When I see people chasing the drugs, the sex, the alcohol, the video games, the junk food, the media, the money, the self image, to try and satisfy. These material things will lose there luster, and the dullness will set in. I feel it, but I know the Way out, I just forget sometimes.

In this modern world we live in, we have so many opportunities to fill those spaces. We feel we have to be constantly connected to media, and constantly be fulfilled in some way. We have been trained thanks to the busy-ness of all of our lives, overly rich food, and all our toys that each minute we are meant to be happy. This messes us up. This messes with our relationship with the Lord, and what it looks like to truly follow Christ.

I’m currently reading “7: An experimental mutiny against excess” by Jen Hatmaker and let me tell you, it is messing me up. She does a seven month long fast, where she focuses on a different area of excess each month including food, clothes, possessions, media, waste, spending, and stress. It reads like a journal, but there is so much truth in each entry.

I’m embarking on my own. Not the same as Jen’s. Not a Daniel fast (but very similar). But a fast.

I’m starting with 30 days and I’ll go from there.

I’m still working/praying over the specifics but so far heres what I have.

{The Food Part}

  • A vegan diet
  • No sugar
  • No coffee
  • No fried food
  • Food with minimal processing and packaging.

Each week (maybe two)  I’m going to focus on a different area like media (big one), money, waste, my campus, etc. I’ve got lots of topics.

Today was day one.

I’m hungry.